Jonathon Howard Spain
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My tiny angel. You came among us, small and weak. The doctors gave little hope for survival. But you proved them wrong, and you grew and thrived. You scared us many times, but were always there the in the morning.
So many times, I thought we had lost you. You showed the world what the love of a mother can do with help from the Hand of God.
You touched so many with your strength and will. I do not believe that I will ever truly know how many lives you have touched. I look forward to finding out how many were praying for you when I get to Heaven.
You were growing so well, we spoke often of taking you home. When you started to get sicker, we hoped against hope. As many miracles as we had seen through you, it was hard to accept that you would be leaving us after all. You slid back so fast. It was so hard to comprehend. No one wanted to believe it.
Mommie, Daddy, Phillip, Aunt Judi, Brother Howard, and your wonderful nurses all loved and cuddled and coddled and spoiled you. We comforted you as best we knew how....but it wasn't enough. You were still in pain. You wanted to return to God. Your time here was over. You had accomplished what you were set here for.
Everyone hoped the moment wouldn't come, but it did. The moment to say goodbye. We loved you, and watched as others came to say goodbye to your beautiful face and spirit; to kiss you. You seemed grateful that Daddy and I now understood.
I made you a few promises. No more needles, no more "sticks", no more suctioning, no more forced feeds, no more gloves, no more pain, no more suffering. Straight from Mommie's arms to the arms of Jesus.
When it was time to pull your feeding tube, it was my hand. When it was time to remove your breathing tubes, it was my hand. I held you and caressed you in my arms as you faded away in peace and in love. I love you, and I always will, my beautiful little boy.
